Monday, 17 May 2010

The Thief of Rage - 17th May 2010

Do you know who your friends are?

Be careful before you answer that.

Think long and hard and ask these questions of your self and of your so called friends.

  1. Are they always there for you as you have been for them?
  2. Are they always honest and forthright?
  3. What motivates you friendship? Mutual respect or convenience?
  4. When the chips are down are they certain to be there helping you?
Cynicism is not a trait that I naturally have but boy am I beginning to nurture a cynical attitude as I grow older.
During a roller coaster ride of a working life I have seen, and been integral to, some moderate success. I have been pestered by recruitment consultants who have swarmed all over me like flies on a hot cow pat. I have met some of the sweetest and kindest of individuals and I have met others who would make Lucifer’s skin crawl. Despicable creatures who lie, manipulate and deceive their way through life with one central focus, one overriding concern - their own pathetic and worthless skin. Their own shallow egos are all that matters with truth, honesty and decency the forged credit cards that they use to trade their way. True friendship is an alien concept to them. Honour and integrity are but hollow words that they can't comprehend let alone pronounce. They are the drains at the bottom of your tea cup, the hole in your favourite shoe, the unpleasant stain on your suit, the dog mess that clings to your instep. They are the dregs of humanity and are as unworthy to be called human as they are friend.
Out of the many people that I have met and liked and got on with, discounting the life long friends that I have, there are only a small portion who have, on a number of occasions, proven to be stalwart-true-blue friends.
For me a friend isn't simply someone who phones each and every hour to see that you are alright, although I am not discounting someone who does, but rather is someone, who when the shit hits the fan, proves there worth by, without asking for praise, gets arm pit deep in the mess and helps to get you out of it.
Friendship is such a valuable gift, and one worth caring for, but make sure that the individual that you select to call friend truly fulfils that definition and isn't there just because it suits them.
Friendship, to paraphrase and old advert, isn't just for Christmas, it is for life.

all words and art are copyright © of C.J. Duffy.


Perfect Virgo said...

Some thought-provoking stuff there CJ.

I could teach 'advanced cynicism' to the 'cynics' but you're running me close! I've always been one to choose carefully and go out of my way to avoid the ugly specimens you described. Even so I was tricked and had a very nasty experience at work several years ago.

Take care ol' chap! ;-)

C.J.Duffy said...

PV>>>I hope that I am not being cynical. I know it is meant to be cool to be so after all wasn't Lennon the great cynic? I know what you mean though!
I have found, having been far too liberal and generous in my life, that there are people who offer you the gift of friendship and who are generous and kind to a fault but there also those who 'use' the term 'friend' to broadly apply to anyone and everyone they meet. Take Facebook for example where hordes of people want to be your 'friend' without ever having met you. I am not saying for a minute that there is anything wrong with facebook or the people, like myself, who use it but it does seem a bit odd doesn't it?
This diatribe is aimed specifically at people, and you must have met them, that shake your hand, buy you a pint, call you mate, then, as you found out, stab you when your back is turned. I appreciate my friends, you included, but I am more wary now of those that are best chums with you on first meeting them or who are overly 'friendly' in an insincere way.

Just call me old grumpy!!

Doug said...

C.J., you've got some things to prove before I'll look up to you as grumpy.

Foody said...

I so agree, CJ. Have survived a few hammerings from "friends" myself so I recognised a lot of what you say. It has left me wondering if something specific has happened to you in the last couple of days to provoke this diatribe.

C.J.Duffy said...

Doug>>>Bless you, sir. Grumpy was my favourite Dwarf though!

Perfect Virgo said...

My comment was slightly tongue-in-cheek CJ, it's me who's theo old cynic! The Facebook phenomenon is indeed quite ridiculous most of the time. I barely use it but still get alerted to crazy status updates and sundry fictitious shenannigans!

Too often sincerity is an under-rated virtue in modern life. I find it very attractive and a sign of true friendship. I'm glad you're my friend, Mr Grumpy!

C.J.Duffy said...

Foody>>>No one in particular although some years back a chap to whom I had been loyal did, inadvertently betray me.

Katie McKenna said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Katie McKenna said...

only cause I can't spell! lol.. I simply wanted to say I can appreciate this post.

Anonymous said...

Came to your blog through Gul's. Saw a reflection of myself somewhere in the posts.will visit again.

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A Utility Fish Shed Blog

A Utility Fish Shed Blog